MY PUPPY

Our sweet, sensitive Labradoodle got spayed last week. Of course, it is inevitable. It is routine. However, it is a complex major surgery.

I made the appointment at Homeward Pet, a local low-cost spay and neuter clinic that also rescues dogs and cats. I had over a month before they could fit her in, so I had time to adjust to the idea. Of course, I was concerned about it. It is major surgery.

Augie is the most sensitive, aware, thinking dog I have ever met. She uses her soft muzzle to console sad people, to comfort those who are in need. She never misdiagnoses- she is always right on. Constantly trying to put together the puzzles that are humans, she often twists her head from side to side as if to say, "What are you saying?" She is loyal, obedient and smart- so very smart. Perhaps it is even more than that. Maybe she is intuitive.

That morning she needed to be at the clinic at 8:00 am. Leading up to the surgery, my husband made me promise that if anything seemed weird, I would turn and run. I promised. She was happy to go in the car. I already felt like a deceptive person. Waiting outside (we were early) we met some other spay/neuter candidates. They were scared and nervous; barking, pacing. Augie was anxious to meet any new friends. There were no new friends there that day.

When we went inside, I gave the place the scan. It was meagerly furnished, but clean. The woman checking me in was dressed in scrubs and very kind and calming. So far, so good. Then we went back.

The operating room doubled as the kennel. The cages were very clean and spaced about 3 feet apart. If they filled them all with prospective spay clients, they would have their hands full. Augie did not want to go back, but did because she is obedient and trusts me. I was beginning to feel like a real heel.

At the door of the crate, she stopped and would go no farther. The kind woman and I had to get behind her and shove. When locked in, I looked into her expressive eyes. I could almost hear her cry out, "Don't leave me here!" But it was just silence- Augie never cries.

I felt so badly. I couldn't really explain it to her, but I did tell her I would be back in a little while. I hoped she understood. All I could do was wait. I tried calling later that afternoon, but only got voicemail. They are very busy, I know.

She has bounced back (literally) very well. Perhaps all of my concern was ill-founded. But she is my puppy. She trusts me and I did not want to squander that trust. She seems to have forgiven me, if I needed forgiveness. I guess that might be one of the things we appreciate most about our dogs. They always forgive no matter how bad we might be.